Chapter 7 - The first warning I ignored
Emily had complained about Derek before.
That became my own shame.
Three months earlier:
“Dad, Derek says I’m a baby when I call you.”
I told Laura.
She said:
“He means when she calls because she doesn’t like dinner.”
I believed enough.
Another time:
“Derek makes me sit in the laundry room.”
“What?”
“When I’m rude.”
Door open?
“Yes.
How long?
“Ten minutes.”
I called Laura.
She became defensive.
“He uses a calm-down chair.”
“In a laundry room?”
“There’s a chair by the mudroom.”
Emily had called it laundry room.
Laura called it mudroom.
I chose the less alarming version.
Why?
Because divorced parents live with a constant fear of turning every disagreement into evidence.
Laura and I had spent our first year after divorce accusing each other of:
Undermining.
Overreacting.
Using Emily.
I did not want to become the father who treated a new boyfriend as automatically dangerous.
So I told Emily:
“If Derek ever scares you, call me.”
She said:
“He just gets mad.”
I should have asked:
What does mad look like?
I did not.
May you like
My failure did not equal Derek’s.
Still mine.
