Chapter 15 - Elowen’s mistake was not a mistake
Children do strange things with guilt.
Elowen stopped carrying photographs.
Then stopped looking at them.
Dr. Brooks noticed.
“Do you think you did something wrong by bringing your mother’s picture?”
Elowen nodded.
“Why?”
“Marcella gets mad.”
“Is Marcella’s anger your job?”
“No.”
“Does it feel like it?”
“Yes.”
I sat beside her.
That answer sounded painfully familiar.
My whole childhood had been organized around adult anger.
Who is angry?
Why?
What do we do so it stops?
I said:
“Elowen, you can bring Mommy’s picture when you want. You can leave it home when you want. Neither choice is for Marcella.”
“What if people think it’s weird?”
“People think your father is a mob boss.”
Dr. Brooks looked at me.
“What?”
“Bad joke?”
“Yes.”
Elowen laughed anyway.
Good.
Then she said:
“I don’t want the silver frame.”
“Okay.”
“Can I have plastic?”
“Yes.”
“Marcella can’t break plastic.”
“She probably can.”
Dr. Brooks gave me another look.
“Still bad?”
“Yes.”
Elowen giggled.
We bought a cheap acrylic photo holder.
May you like
Three dollars.
Celine would have found that hilarious.
