Chapter 24 - After Court
Helen became Grandma again slowly.
Supervised visits became ordinary visits with one of us present.
Then short visits at her condo.
Never discipline alone.
Never “practice.”
She asked before correcting anything beyond immediate safety.
Sometimes too much.
“Can I tell him not to put shoes on couch?”
Laura laughed.
“Yes, Helen.”
Mom was learning distinction between normal adult authority and control.
Ethan learned too.
Grandma could say:
“No cookies before dinner.”
That did not mean:
No food until you stop crying.
Grandma could say:
“Hold my hand crossing street.”
That did not mean:
Obedience is always proof of love.
Richard had no contact for six months after sentencing.
He completed class.
We received progress through attorneys only.
Then a letter.
Not to Ethan.
To Laura and me.
I will not ask you to show this to him.
Good start.
I was wrong to create a training system behind your backs.
I was wrong to treat his fear as something I had authority to defeat.
I was wrong to use Michael’s childhood as evidence that my methods were good.
Then:
I still believe children need challenge.
Fair.
But challenge without consent from parents and without a child’s safe way to stop became something else.
Better.
Then:
I am sorry.
No request.
No “but.”
Laura read twice.
“What do you think?”
“I believe he wrote it.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
“I don’t know yet.”
May you like
Good.
No deadline.
