Chapter 7 - What Helen Wrote
I was not allowed to take evidence home.
Good.
My attorney later received copies through the family case.
The first notebook started when I was four.
Same age as Ethan.
Columns:
TASK.
REACTION.
RESET.
RESULT.
BIKE — training wheels removed.
Reaction:
Cried 18 minutes.
Reset:
Back on seat x4.
Result:
Completed driveway.
Another:
BLANKET.
Goal:
Sleep without comfort object.
Reaction:
Called Mom.
Reset:
No return.
Result:
Slept after 2 a.m.
My throat closed.
Then:
FALL.
Reaction:
Crying 11 minutes.
Goal:
Under 3.
I stopped reading.
Laura took pages from my hand.
“You don’t have to finish.”
“I do.”
“No.”
She looked directly at me.
“You want to. Different.”
I hated that she was right.
Again.
The older notebook also contained Mom’s handwriting.
Sometimes supportive.
Sometimes protective.
Richard:
Five laps.
Helen:
Stopped at three. Wheezing.
Richard:
WHY?
Later:
Completed five.
Different ink.
Mom had lied to Dad to shorten punishment.
But not always.
Other entries were written neatly by her.
She had participated.
Then Ethan’s notebook.
The same headings.
Not similar.
Same.
BIKE.
FELIX.
GARAGE LINE.
BALL.
CRYING.
SNACK.
One page:
Rule: no call to parents during practice unless injury/emergency.
Another:
If “I can’t” → restart.
Another:
Comfort makes avoidance stronger.
Then Helen’s handwriting:
Too much. Gave water.
Richard beneath:
UNDERMINED.
Another:
Ethan upset after 8 min line.
Stopped.
Richard:
Should restart next week.
I felt nauseous.
This was not one grandfather losing his temper.
It was a system.
Still, Chapter 10 was not complete.
One question remained.
Who decided to bring the old system back?
May you like
I assumed Dad.
I was wrong.
