Chapter 7 - My brother had always been “good with children”
Arthur loved describing himself as good with children.
He had no children of his own.
That did not stop him.
At restaurants, he corrected nephews.
At Christmas, he enforced gift-opening order.
At family barbecues, he told children not to run.
Some adults found this helpful.
I had too.
That was uncomfortable to admit.
Before Gigi, I once watched him make our cousin’s six-year-old return to a chair after the child walked away from dinner.
Arthur said:
“Your mother told you to sit.”
The kid sat.
Everyone praised him.
“Arthur should have been a dad.”
“He gets children.”
No.
Arthur got compliance.
I had mistaken that for skill.
He believed adults became weak when they explained too much.
His favorite phrase:
“Kids test whatever boundary you’re too scared to enforce.”
When Gigi was born, he told me:
“Don’t become one of those mothers who negotiates with a toddler.”
I laughed.
Then became exactly the kind of mother who sometimes negotiated with a toddler because toddlers are irrational creatures who still deserve humane treatment.
Arthur saw that as failure.
May you like
The party was not the first disagreement.
It was the first time he converted his opinion into physical punishment.
