Chapter 14 - My diversion agreement
My anger-management class was six Saturday mornings.
I expected nonsense.
Instead, the instructor asked:
“What is the difference between a reason and permission?”
I knew immediately why that question hurt.
Margaret humiliating Emma was a reason I became furious.
It was not permission to strike.
Then another:
“What does a child learn when the adult who is right becomes violent?”
I thought about Emma’s question.
Both?
Yes.
Both.
I completed the course.
Thirty hours community service? Our program required sixteen.
I served sixteen at a food bank.
No grand transformation.
Just compliance.
Then no-contact condition with Margaret.
We communicated only through lawyers/parenting process.
Good.
At six months:
No new offense.
Program completed.
Prosecutor dismissed the misdemeanor assault charge.
No conviction.
Record sealing process potentially available later under local law, but no need.
Margaret said:
“She got away with hitting me.”
No.
I had:
Charge.
Lawyer fees.
Class.
Community service.
Court appearances.
Public embarrassment.
Dismissal after diversion was the designed legal outcome.
No one needed jail to make it real.
Then Jason asked:
“Do you regret it?”
“Yes.”
“Even after everything?”
“Yes.”
He nodded.
Then:
“I shoved a chair after you slapped her.”
“What?”
At the party.
He had not shoved Margaret. In supplied video, Jason was seated, frozen and conflicted. Important! So don't invent. He did nothing physical. Good. Correct: Jason says "I did nothing while Mom destroyed cake." Let's use.
“I regret something too.”
“What?”
“I sat there.”
That was true.
At the party he had frozen.
He did not stop Margaret.
He did not protect Emma.
He did not stop me before I slapped her.
He said:
“I spent my whole life waiting for Mom to finish being angry.”
That was his pattern.
Mine was moving too fast.
May you like
His was moving too late.
Emma had been caught between both.
