Chapter 9 - Why Daniel stayed quiet
Daniel asked to speak with me through attorneys.
I refused twice.
Then agreed to one structured meeting.
No Evelyn.
No Lucy.
Daniel looked terrible.
He had lost weight.
I felt nothing.
Then hated myself for feeling nothing.
He said:
“I thought it was some herbal thing.”
“Did you ask?”
“No.”
“You told her no more.”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because you don’t give babies anything.”
“Then why didn’t you tell me?”
He looked down.
“Because I knew you’d throw her out.”
“Yes.”
“I needed her help.”
That answer was devastating because it was so ordinary.
“You needed sleep.”
“We both did.”
“So you kept it from me.”
“I thought it was over.”
“You decided I didn’t need to know someone gave our newborn something without permission.”
“Yes.”
He cried.
I did not comfort him.
Then:
“Did Lucy ever tell you about white powder?”
He wiped his face.
“A few days before.”
My stomach turned.
“What did she say?”
“Something like Grandma makes snow milk.”
“And?”
“I thought she meant formula.”
“Then why did Lucy say you told Grandma no more snow?”
Daniel closed his eyes.
“I used her words when I confronted Mom.”
There.
He had made the connection.
Not enough to know what substance.
Enough to know Lucy had seen the same behavior.
May you like
He told his mother to stop.
Then left her alone with our twins again.
